I Couldn’t Have Said It Better Myself: Illinois Settles For Tofu


Every once in a while, a blogger comes across a line that is so good that he wishes he had come up with it. That’s what I discovered over at Sibboleth Nation:

It’s hard to believe that people are willing to settle for Mitt Romney. It’s like settling for tofu when you want a juicy steak. I don’t get it. He has no conservative credentials whatsoever. He is a proven flip-flopper.

As a former chef, I can tell you that tofu works on more levels than you might be aware of. Tofu has very little flavor on its own, it tends to absorb whatever flavor you put it with, for example in a marinade, or in the pan you’re cooking it in.

Mitt is that sort of politician. Put him in the deep south, and he’s talking about liking grits. Put him in front of NARAL, he’s saying that he’ll be “moderate” on abortion. Put him in an Obama-supporting northeastern state, and he believes in anthropogenic global warming. Then put him in Pittsburgh and he starts sounding like he’s questioning whether humans are causing global warming.

Just like tofu, Mitt absorbs whatever he’s put into, and ultimately ends up not being very satisfying.

Great simile, TerranceH. I may have to borrow it from time to time.

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About Conservative Wanderer

Conservative Wanderer is currently Editor-in-Chief of That's Freedom You Hear! That means anything that goes wrong can be blamed on him. Previously he was a contributor to the PJ Tatler.

3 responses to “I Couldn’t Have Said It Better Myself: Illinois Settles For Tofu”

  1. TerranceH says :

    Thanks. LOL.

    As a former chef, I can tell you that tofu works on more levels than you might be aware of. Tofu has very little flavor on its own, it tends to absorb whatever flavor you put it with, for example in a marinade, or in the pan you’re cooking it in.

    Mitt is that sort of politician. Put him in the deep south, and he’s talking about liking grits. Put him in front of NARAL, he’s saying that he’ll be “moderate” on abortion. Put him in an Obama-supporting northeastern state, and he believes in anthropogenic global warming. Then put him in Pittsburgh and he starts sounding like he’s questioning whether humans are causing global warming.

    Just like tofu, Mitt absorbs whatever he’s put into, and ultimately ends up not being very satisfying.

    And that is brilliant!

  2. deliaangel says :

    Tofutti! Meatless Mittens! LMAO

    H-A-P-P-Y B-I-R-T-H-D-A-Y to youuuuuuu (said in breathy voice).

    “Happy Birthday, Dear BIG D., Happy Birthdaaaaaay, toooo, youuuuuu”

    -And, many moooore *pinches your cheek [the lower one heh]*

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